09Nov 2009

Whatever will be will be

I have a tendency to think that I’m somewhat of a loner. And I suppose there is some truth to that statement. I can spend many hours or even days by myself without feeling lonely. I enjoy my alone time, whether it’s filled with reading, writing, playing games, or just singing to myself at full volume. I never do get up the courage to sing loudly when there are others around.

I also don’t appreciate masses of people the way others do. They make me feel nervous and edgy, and god forbid I’m the center of attention. Want to see me turn beet red? Have a crowd focus their attention solely on me. I have no grand dreams to be a movie star or something similar. I value my privacy far too much.

On the other hand, my personality has shifted towards being much more social and outgoing than I previously was. Back in high school, I was painfully shy. Literally. Maybe the reason no one ever remembered my name was because no one remembers the wall flower, especially when she has two rather boisterous friends (they were still awesome friends though). University and college were no better. I made one or two friends in the entire 5 years and I didn’t keep in contact with them. And talking to guys? That was yet another way to get me to blush.

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