Dalea’s Pub Crawl
As someone who doesn’t drink, I often have the unique view of being the only sober person (and permanent designated driver) around a lot of drunks. So I can remember some of the hilarious things that happened when others were wasted out of their minds. The following two conversations actually happened and are retold from Dalea’s point of view as she gets smashed herself for Inn League rep.
(Dalea begins the night as a happy drunk.)
Dalea: Guys, guys…I jus’ wanted tah let you know…that I loves you all. You’re the bes’ friends ever. And thissh stew’s awesome!
(Later on, turns into a sad drunk.)
Dalea: There’s *sniffs* there’s no more stew. *whimpers* *sobs* I really want more stew! *cries*
(She ends the night by passing out, only to be awoken as the beast that is Angry Drunk.)
*A drunken townsperson accidentally stumbles over her in his search for some stew.*
Dalea: [Insert a slew of vile yet slurred curses here, punctuated by ineffectively throwing her cloak and various seat cushions at the other patron.]
*The townsperson is still in Happy Drunk mode and gives an unphased smile as he rifles through the cupboards.*
Dalea: Guys, what colour do you think the rabbit is?
Not-as-drunk townperson: …The rabbit is brown.
Dalea: No no no, what colour would you say the rabbit is?
Not-as-drunk townperson: What? Umm…maybe it likes the colour green?
Just-as-drunk townperson: I think that it would be blue.
(The question that was trying to be asked was what colour they thought would best describe the rabbit. Apparently you have to be at a certain level of drunkenness to get it.)